My personal ad might as well read:

SBF with fake hair and nails seeks gold-toothed, gangster rap city thug to be my boo and share intense dance floor girations. Age not important but middle-aged, geri-curled men a plus!

Cause, yeah, those are the men who think that I am PHAT! And someday, when I finally break down and change my name to Sha'niqua Hennesey Johnson and settle down with my baby daddy to breed more playas, you will all wonder what happened to the simple Texas girl who swore that she would wait forever for her prince charming.

**Star Sighting**
Carson from Queer Eye For the Straight Guy shopping at my store...they're filming there on Wednesday