Soul Food
I needed that. I needed a few hugs from mom and a few shots from the brothers and a few cuddles from the niece. New York can be so...impersonal. Being home fills me up in ways that I never even realize I need until I am on the plane headed back to the concrete jungle thinking about riding the train alone. I've made some decisions for the next chapter in my life. They weren't easy to make but I feel like they are right, for now...for me. Someone told me recently that I shouldn't settle for anything less than what I want and deserve in life. The thing is, I can honestly say that when I look back at my life, I have never, not once, settled. I've never taken the easy way out because the trail looked smoother and the flowers smelled nicer. Everything I have in my life I have earned, worked for through tears and anger and pain and frustration. The last few months for me have been a blessing. I found a peace with myself and this city, maybe because I knew that our affair might have to end soon, but the beauty of New York isn't lost on me. Despite the ways it has tried to tear me down, and almost won, there are few places quite as beautiful. I found myself in New York, for the first time I really began to understand who I am and what it is I am capable of doing. Going home and seeing myself reflected in the eyes of my friends and family, I know that it has all been worth the struggle. There are so many things yet to do. So many new experiences yet to be had. And whether those adventures are to be found in this city, or the next, or in my old bedroom down the hall from my mother, I am honored to take the journey and feed my soul.